A Joy in Progress, part duex

Marena, well rested and blissful, rose from the billowy, encompassing bed, stretching her long arms into the air…….moving into a graceful, gliding pirouette across the floor as her heart awoke as well. She had spent a night in his arms, finally. He was off now fetching fresh bakery and hot, dark coffee for their breakfast.  He was a splendid man, a gentle caring man, a friend already and a lover of song, the road and the sky. A smile lived on her lips now as she summoned the memory of their union last night.

He had taken his time; he knew he was burning memories into his brain, as their time standing in the same space will be limited. He touched her softly, as if she were a china doll, fragile and delicate, needing to be handled with great care. As their dance of love deepened, as their passion soared, his touch became more direct; searching her, every inch of her inside and out…speaking soft words as his intention became harder. The perfect pace and the perfect moment beautifully repeated until they lay spent in the arms of each other…….both becoming more alive for the experience.

She allowed herself to be fully free, expressing every desire and offering herself to his desires. It was all they needed, wanted and hoped for, hope re-awakened in the dimly lit, candle filled room that had become the birth place of their melded hearts.

Brought back to the present moment by the sound of the door opening , the aromas of steeped, deep, dark coffee, French pastries, and him filling her senses…. she grinned seductively as he approached her and  kissed the top of her head. “Good morning, m’lady”. “Welcome back to me, kind sir”  she whispered, as they melted into a long, grateful kiss…..

to be continued.....

The Spark Is Thrown

That SPARK! The moment you know, he feels it too...the moment you awake to
 the fire inside
 that you thought had all but died

The FEAR, that becomes anticipation, quickened pulse further sparking
desires hidden deep
that you thought were lost in lamented sleep

You AWAKE to the day, forward looking,.....wanting just to touch her
wide smile on face
awaiting the long sought freedom housed there in her embrace

You ALLOW the feelings to be rekindled, teaching you about yourself
reconnecting you
sweetly sharing your true colors as they meld with his.. creating harmonic hues

Yes, the SPARK.. it sets creation into motion, and as the lover's wheel
begins to turn again
Wiser are you, this time...... discovering true balance in the synergized spin

Stop Falling...

Love

and 

fear

do not 

live in the

same place at the

same time, just don't happen

afraid of falling in love again?

there ain't no rules, there ain't no 

right or wrong, just love, born in beauty

of deep connection, love frees you from the fall 

Yes, love sets you into flight, free and fearless flight

each time anew, safe to move into it with 

heart open, wings spread, lifted upon the gusts

and soaring in the wind, stop falling

and instead fly into love fully

we don't find love, really

it finds us, freely

then we choose

fear or

love
<3

Cold and Complainin'

Seasons change, sometimes subtly, other times fast and fiercely, the 'northers of the heart moving in without a warning, the seas of our tempers flare and swell until the waves toss us into uncharted waters and we are lost. Bam......just like that.

I have a saying.....( well, I have MANY sayings) "it's always better to be lost with someone else than alone." To translate, if you find yourself wandering a trail not on a map, or you have taken the wrong turn in a large, unknown city....isn't it nice to look beside you and find your friend there? Someone who knows the fear that you are experiencing at this very moment, someone to cling to if it gets dark and cold? Someone to tell you "it's going to be alright"

If you find yourself 10 miles out from land in the middle of your deepest fears...... allow it to teach you, to the depths of your soul. You may find you are not roaming un-chosen, but rather, your friend is right beside you, obscured in the fog of flared tempers.............listen for her song, reach out your hand, and the storm shall cease.

Passing on a Gift....

A Classic DD from Valentine's Day 2011.......a love letter to my love for Dan and his art. The BEST gift I have ever been given on this day hands down! This culminated on a retreat, a time when my soul gets so quiet, I can hear my own beliefs. <3

Sometimes in life, you receive signs, messages and offerings of love and peace that are undeniable.

This past weekend I was honored to guide 2 beautiful women into the woods to discover truths they already possessed......that their inner teacher is active and wants them to know they can trust her and allow her to speak out in purpose and wisdom.

When preparing for a retreat, I always listen to my intuition on all counts, and especially about how the opening evening should progress, what would be most needed by each soul on the journey with me, etc. Many months ago, as I was returning from a visit with my daughter and her family, I was in the car listening to Dan, my road companion. "In the Passage" came on the iPod in shuffle mode. Instantly I knew I was to share the lyrics to this song with the ladies joining me on the retreat.

The first words to the song are:
"There's a ring around the moon tonight, and a chill in the air"
As I have heard the song over the years, I would visualize in my mind's eye, the moon Dan might have witnessed that birthed these lyrics into their existence. I could feel the cool night air and sense his amazement at such a moon on such a night. Dan's songs ALWAYS paint a picture in my mind, always! I am sure this was his desire.... for us to see movies in our brains, that are personal to us alone as we listen to his fluid art. I heard him say in an interview once that music videos take away the personal images a song can gift to someone. I so agree with this!

As I was saying, when I prepare for presentations or retreats, or lesson plans, I shoot from the hip, processing it all in my head as I move closer to the event. It does not bode well for me to over prepare, I like to utilize the spontaneity of a moment and the synergy of those in the room to spark the flow of my teaching.
So, a few days before we were to head out, the song presented to me again, and I printed off the words to share with Theresa and Dana.

The theme of the weekend was "Your Inner Teacher". In the Passage speaks to so many issues around this theme. On Friday night, I presented the printed page to the ladies and told them they could read the words later if they liked, and that Dan had been my first real spiritual teacher.... that he guided me to the inner wisdom my soul possessed. I always say he knew my soul better than I did.

We continued on with my gently guided "presentation" and then spent lots of time bonding on that first night. We learned about each other, laughed, cried and experienced a visit from a loved one on the other side of the veil. A pretty amazing bonding session. Stories about Unicorns, grandfathers, families, fears and joys made up the strands of the unique fabric we weaved together.

On Saturday morning, we all awoke to silence and the inner journey that brought us all together. We spent time in the woods, in contemplative silence, and with hands moving across page as our own lyrics made themselves visible to us. Each of us on the perfect date with stillness and silence we had come to experience.

The day was warm, clear and bright. A lady bug came to me and spent time in my room as I wrote, and wrote and wrote. She spent time on my page, my window sill and my pillow. The rhythm of the melting snow falling from the rooftops pulsed out Gaia's heartbeat as I spent time in my little pink walled room that transformed into a BIG PINK WOMB of creativity.

That night, when the sun hunkered down to its gentle slumber, I dove into a deep meditation. At some point I was jostled out of this deep soul excursion by a thought, clear and direct....."look outside for stars". Obeying this call to action, I gazed; a bit sleepy eyed; out through the angled window atop my bedside. And then I saw the fuzzy glow, not of a star, but of a gift!!! I became very awake immediately. I donned my coat and boots and the other necessary winter garb and headed out into the mild February night. I was quietly greeted by Theresa who was outside already. I nodded my head to her and smiled. She met my acknowledgment with one of her own. "Hello, fellow Goddess" we wordlessly conveyed to each other.

I lifted my gaze skyward, and there I saw the most beautiful half moon, completely surrounded by a ring of white resembling the taffeta and netting of a fairy princess' dress. I stood there in humbled shock for a few minutes, blown away by the synergistic events that brought me to this very place of realization. The realization that I was receiving a visit from Dan, or a visit of collective awareness somehow orchestrated on a plane other than this physical one. The full skirted hoop of this heavenly dress was too far expanded to capture on my camera. 'It is only to be captured in my memory", I thought to myself.
The picture painted for me this night, as the lyrics to In the Passage ran through my mind, was right there in front of my eyes, at the precise timing when it meant more to me than it ever could or ever would again. "WOW" kept emitting from my lips. "WOW!!!"

There indeed was "a ring around the moon tonight and a chill in the air", and I was a woman blessed in ways immeasurable! The ring of connection that we are a part of was showcased in that moment, in grand form for all to see!!!! The chill in the air dissipated gently, as my heart warmed to that of a glowing ember.

A Joy in Progress

Marena was a peaceful woman, she was well seated in her truth, confident and hearty.....a lover of life. A strong, yet gentle woman, a heart of compassion and great wisdom beat in her chest. She was loved by others, and openly shared her life with her friends, and those she encountered in her day. Wisely honoring herself and pulling back when her deep intuition warranted it. She allowed her choice around who got in and who did not, who became a friend and who did not.

A mother, one who had always instilled all of herself into her child, allowing her to stumble, soar and everything in between. Showing her that life was indeed a journey and an honor to be a part of. The girl learned well and grew into an amazing woman, truly herself, with a bit of mama to be seen now and again.

A Grandmother now, as well. The gift of this reproductive circle giving endless joy to her over and over again. There lived an effortless euphoria in the eyes of these perfect, compact creatures who smelled of sunshine and fresh dirt after a day of play.

Into her 50th year, feeling fully and rightfully deserving of this station in her life......content to be where she was and knowing she had honored mistakes and missteps along her path. These experiences had grown her into who she was today.....Marena Alissia Stanton, strong, wise, modestly beautiful and peacefully content. It was a good, solid life.

Subtly and quietly in her meditative places, a desire crept in now and again....."My passion is unrequited, I am still young". Secretly she dreamed of being that vibrant, sensual lioness she was not so long ago. What had been a deep fire burning had now become soft embers glowing that she would stoke herself when it seemed they may die out forever. In these moments, her soul cried out for a partner beside her, one who could match the passion she still carried inside her. It was enough, it was fine... she would tell herself, knowing all along she was denying her own innate needs.

And then, she heard it.... ever so quietly triggered during a casual conversation with a friend....a gentle melody rising from the background, so subtle, it was almost undetectable.......something within her stirred....had she really heard this song begin to build, what did it mean?

Over several days, the song grew more audible and the tune caught in her head, repeating itself as she gently vibed the harmony to it in a soothing, seductive hum.

The song became known to her heart, and her soul. She sang it joyfully, loudly and with wild passion and freedom. The fire was returning, the lioness was waking from her deep jungled sleep...... Marena was more alive than she had been in so very long. So grateful she was, to be sweetly steeped in the juicy revival she was allowing for herself !!!

With unbridled rebirth, heart fully open..... she hummed the song to herself as she slid off into gentle slumber......

Inside the Circle

A circle knows no end, nor does it begin
It simply is, always
Those seated in a circle no hierarchy know
All equal, all connected, all the same
All the time

We live on a vibrant, slowly dying circle
She cries, are you listening?
A larger circle yet, encompasses us all
Infinite circles, blending, intersecting,
a web of weaved connection

Love's symbol? A circle
a ring, a glowing gem
Circles do not restrict
Let those who have no rights to place that ring
Be righted NOW!
Love has no end, its beginning lives inside us

The sacred drum....a circle
Its beat sending circular vibrations out ward
Healing our mama circle, and her creatures
The stones, the Oceans, the air
Beat your drum

You belong inside the circle
We belong in the circle
You, me, we, them, us
All the same
Inside the circle

A Toast to the Rain.....

Wash me, rain

Wash me free of myself

Wash me away from my fears

Wash me anew to that which you bring me

peaceful, calm honoring

Let your drops hit my face

Let the growth come

Let the connection be birthed

Let me accept this gift

 My desire becomes hot, heavy steam

as you quench my deeply seated, resurrected passion

one drop at a time

opening me, freeing me, re-establishing my balance

Not knowing I was lost

his subtle bravery woke me 

Shaking me from my self deprived slumber

and, in one magical moment

I was found

Found to myself

Found to him

 future unknown, yet cherished completely

<3
I offer a toast to you, rain

and I drink greedily of your wisdom

as you wash me clean

Find Yourself First

You are worthy of being loved, we all are.....sometimes it just takes time. Love can not be had for free, there are no rules involved, regardless of our desire to place them there.
Patience is called into play in such extremely evident ways as you wait. The evidence being shown in long, lingering lonely nights......things get so dark. We begin to distrust any confidence we have in ourselves and life becomes a quest for someone else, a painful reminder that we are alone.

While singing your sad song to the wind, you are taking opportunity away from yourself. Change your song, and the one who harmonizes with you will appear. BAM!  She is right there, has been there, but hers is a song of honor and peace. So is yours, allow it!

You can't be found until you find yourself, how can a soul with a hidden song be discovered?

Find your song, you own it, it is inside you....it is joyful

Find your truth, innate wisdom that only you possess

Find your grounding, get your feet firmly planted, so you can stand when she shows herself...love can bowl ya over!

Find your love, sing your blended song LOUDLY!!!!!!!

Cadence of the drum....

 Swaying, softly, she holds him to her, gently repeating his name over and over in her mind

The cadence of his moniker matches the meter of the Conga drum's seductive sultry call

Free she feels, light... as if her feet are no longer beneath her

She allows him to take control of the long deep dance they have begun

Leaning into his frame, feeling his chest rise and fall

She melts into him.....

gladly

Stirring from her restless slumber, the reality comes to her in slow truths
Slow and bittersweet reality floating into her conscious mind
"I was dreaming......"
She misses him, yet is comforted by the truth that she would rather miss him madly than never know the rise and fall of his chest and the heart contained within

Smiling, she falls deeply into another magic dream......where will they be led this time?

The Power of Choice

Good Morning.....

Maybe.....to love is not so strange. Perhaps love, in all of its many forms, is the one thing in life that truly connects us, brings us back to our true North and aligns us with who we are, at our very core.
We are given choices in our life, do you realize how precious a choice is? There is such a gift in the act of choosing. I honor the power of a choice, the magic that is wrapped up in the whole process of making a choice.

We make the easy ones, or the ones we have become accustomed to in the blink of an eye regularly, they make sense to us, we are comfortable with them, it is easy, or it has become a habit.

Love is a choice, a beautiful sometimes blissfully messy choice, but one that lifts us to heights beyond our imagination, if we allow ourselves to go there. For some, choosing love is forbidden, unattainable.......those of us who allow it are blessed, for we make the choice from a foundation of self love.

Today, I ask you to choose love above all other things, for it really is the only thing that matters. Our hearts know this, our DNA craves it, our souls soar within it.... like paired Eagles crossing the expanse of a river side by side.

Say yes to the morning of the day you chose love for yourself, in all ways.
<3

A Remake Remark

Have you ever heard about a classic movie that is being remade in HollowWood and you think to your self "NO! How can they even touch that, it is perfect in every way...already."

This is how I feel about Dancing Shoes for so many reasons today. The full scope of this song today, for me,  can not be properly conveyed in words or phrases or metaphors, or honoring verse. I honor it with the perfection of subtle silence and grand gratitude.

Now, today, this song stays as pure as the day it was born from the depths of passion and connection. I honor its place in my life today at this very moment.
And, with humble, heightened awareness, I thank Dan for sending it now...
<3

Whispered Visits

Silently you come upon me

Your erotic whisper visits in my mind.... so real

The tantalizing taste of you 

The soft, yet purposeful perfectly placed caresses 

Your heartbeat matching the cadence of my wildly beating desire

Running rapidly like a wild Mustang , we will not be controlled

 Gloriously, we are set more fully free

In the morning, your aura hovers sweetly in the air 
 happily hung over am I

Skin still quivers

Body still quakes...

I ache for your love......again

Our union is of spirit, we are so blessed

Visits of this kind so rare...and

ours whenever we wish

For your whisper touches me

always

in my heart, in the stillness, in my loins

in the Wind

Frigid Fears Freed

She Moon hangs

pregnant and perfect

in my memory

I miss you

Deeply deprived of your touch

yet knowing you live

inside me

you are in me

Sailing swiftly to our next union 

in my mind

has become my comfort

you comfort me

Tears of awareness fill my eyes

the missing becomes an ache

a precious ache

I ache for you

Fall's frosty air freezes my liquid lamentations

firmly to my cheeks

tracking  the ache I know

I see my sorrow

In these tears is truth

your return

will set my frigid fears free

and my cheeks will glow with the knowledge

of you

       once again

She Moon glows in unison

as she touches us

with her illuminating beam of belonging

 and

You warm me

I emerge

The dark envelopes me

I sink into the grotesque yet alluring comfort of it

I let it wash over me, extracting the toxic effects of our

Love.....Or was it something else?

In the pieces of my soul I crave the peace that I solely knew before I gave myself fully to you

You were never ready, you never fully understood the gift I placed in your hands 
trusting you could love me as I loved you

I trusted you knew love, but....it was something else

Crumpled up here in the dark,

I feel myself growing and sprouting in the moist, pungent remains

of our picked over garden

I release you and honor you for the fertilizer

your false love has been...... for I now see
it WAS something else

The broken connection we endured was not love

was not hate

was not good

was not bad

It was growth with pain and process and reaping and ......dying

From this dark place, I choose to emerge

as something else.....

I emerge as LOVE, and nothing else

SoarMates

I looked beside me
there you were
in formation with me
as we soared like birds

Together we discovered
secrets and stories
and truths
about each other

Effortlessly we lived
and laughed
and
LOVED!

We flew as one, casting one shadow on the ground
as the days flew by and our wings grew strong
together
with new found freedom

Suddenly the wind sent us into a
spin
spinning, careening out of
control
We were not in control

"don't look down" you cried to me
"look into your soul, and you will find me
there"

As I gathered my strength
I lifted myself back upon the
invisible current of air...
In this moment I wanted to hold you tightly
I searched the horizon
but you were no where to be found

Had I lost you???
WHERE are YOU???
Dull reality set in
You had passed....I was alone


Just then my weary heart said to me
"don't look down, look into your soul and you will find me
there"
And I realized
I am never alone, you are with me
as we soar like birds
you
are
my
SoarMate

We-oria Family

Reaching back

Enjoying photographs

Of times shared

and, sorrows repaired

Life reflected

in the uncorrected

red, happy eyes

And the post laugh sighs

Warm summer days

And olden ways

Family ties

Days gone by

Reaching back

I find no slack

in our connecting rope

of energy, love and hope

Family ties

no buts or whys

Just smiles and grins

and "can't wait to see you again"s

That's how the DanFam rolls

Gentle, caring souls

Who meet for yearly euphoria

in a place we know as Weoria

The Wind Through the Window

The open window whisper sings a chill to me
turning, I greet the crispness of it

"Hello,old friend! 

Welcome back, forgive me for being unaware. 

I guess I should have felt you.....

coming"

Memories than flow and I
cry freely, fully
bittersweet acknowledgment of things that
were
and never were
and simply should have not been, yet
indeed ......were

The cycles, the seasons
blow the blustery
brilliance of crisp sorrow,
joy and recollection back to us
when we least expect it.....
thankfully

For in these moments of
beautiful
un-awareness
we become so aware that we
......................cry

Aching, breaking

Hidden heart, enigmatic life giver

how can you sustain me if I know you not?

Bonded wings, weighted down, earth bound by fear

how can you lift me if I free you not?

Cage door, rusted closed by my tears of self rejection

how can I know myself if I allow not my truth?

Nourishment, sleep and rest which renew me

how can you protect me if I honor you not?

Freedom....elusive, relentlessly I chase you

how can I not  allow you...NOW?

Faithful friend who sees me

will you always hold a place for me

when my wings fail and my tears return and I am starving

 for love

Yes, you answer, if you ever need it

I will sustain you, lift you, protect you, honor you....

always