I emerge

The dark envelopes me

I sink into the grotesque yet alluring comfort of it

I let it wash over me, extracting the toxic effects of our

Love.....Or was it something else?

In the pieces of my soul I crave the peace that I solely knew before I gave myself fully to you

You were never ready, you never fully understood the gift I placed in your hands 
trusting you could love me as I loved you

I trusted you knew love, but....it was something else

Crumpled up here in the dark,

I feel myself growing and sprouting in the moist, pungent remains

of our picked over garden

I release you and honor you for the fertilizer

your false love has been...... for I now see
it WAS something else

The broken connection we endured was not love

was not hate

was not good

was not bad

It was growth with pain and process and reaping and ......dying

From this dark place, I choose to emerge

as something else.....

I emerge as LOVE, and nothing else